A Memorial Day “Number” to Remember: 63,922

This Monday, the 27th of May, is Memorial Day.

It’s the day our country sets apart as a day to remember all the men and women who have died while serving in the United States military.  Nearly every city in our country will offer some service or “moment” this coming Monday.

We are encouraged to pause, reflect, and – most importantly – remember the high cost of freedom.  Indeed, many Sunday morning houses of worship will join the chorus calling us to remember!

As you prepare for this day, I’d like to ask you to remember something a little different, as well.  Not instead of, but along with, if you will.

Remember this number: 63,992. 

That’s the astounding number of visitors one porn site receives per minute.  That means that on days like Memorial Day, this one porn site will receive over 100 million visits.

Why am I asking that you remember this number?  Because it represents an assault – an outright attack – on the very freedoms our country holds dear.

The freedoms our brave men and women sacrifice their life to secure we now trample on and distort at an alarming rate.

Continue reading “A Memorial Day “Number” to Remember: 63,922″

What You Need to Know Before You Join a Recovery Group

Have you ever asked yourself, “What will it take to beat this addiction?”  I sure did.

Many times.

Over.

And.

Over.

And.

Over.

Again.

My wife asked it of me about a thousand times more than I asked it of myself.

Here’s the deal: If you’re asking, at least you are acknowledging that you have a problem!

Many Men Never Ask the Question: “What will it take?”

Most men – many men – never get that far.

While I can’t tell you every step you’re going to need to take, I can give you many of them.

One I’ve not discussed yet is the power of community!

I don’t know anyone who has ever beat addiction in isolation!

So, if you’re fighting alone, then you’re falling apart!

Continue reading “What You Need to Know Before You Join a Recovery Group”

Can I Be Clean Without a Full Confession?

When considering addiction, particularly porn, I don’t believe you can ever be free unless you fully confess!

Therefore, I often tell men who come to me for help that the most crucial step in your recovery and restoration process is the step of confession.

There is simply no way you will ever be whole if you don’t fully confess.

I don’t care what the addiction or compulsion is:

  • Porn or sexual addiction.
  • Alcohol.
  • Anger (yes, that can be an addiction).
  • The internet or social media.
  • Recreational or prescription drugs.
  • Work, success, reputation.
  • Nicotine
  • Gambling

To name only a few.

And, while I am a person of faith, this step has little to do with one’s faith conviction.  It does not matter if you have no faith, a deep faith, or are anti-faith!  Confession is part and parcel of what it means to be human and to be in relationship with others.

That’s why I never tasted freedom, or could even begin the journey into freedom, until I got the place where I was willing to fully confess my compulsion (sin, addiction) in several different ways.

So, if you want to be free and have the courage to live into freedom, read on for some things I’ve done, and continue to do, to live into freedom!

Continue reading “Can I Be Clean Without a Full Confession?”

How do I “Unsee” All Those Pornographic Images?

Have you ever wondered how to unsee all those pornographic images you’ve spent years viewing?

If so, you’re not alone.  In fact, that’s a common – and often misunderstood – part of the journey.  Especially when you want to make the transition from a life saturated by free-porn to a life that’s finally porn-free!

Once you decide it’s time to live a porn-free life, you begin to notice how hard it is to get all those images out of your head.

Many of us find ourselves fighting images every moment of the day.  Many find that pornographic images also haunt our dreams at night.

In my experience, the toughest part of the battle is unseeing what we’ve seen!

Continue reading “How do I “Unsee” All Those Pornographic Images?”

A Dozen (or so) Alarming Trends Directly Related to Porn Addiction, Pt. 4

A Dozen (or so) Alarming Trends Directly Related to Porn Addiction, Pt. 4

As I reflect on my past of porn consumption/addiction, I cannot recall one moment of mutual consent.

In fact, the experience of viewing pornography is discordant on every level. While enticing one with passion, delight, and satisfaction, pornography is cloaked in power, domination, and self-absorption.

In short order, it’s all about consumption. The consumer both consumes and is consumed!

Porn consumption (a.k.a, viewing) ignites an insatiable urge to, first visually and then physically, consume the flesh of another. Once we give in to this desire, we are sacrificed on the altar of power, control, and self-inflicted slavery.

I often utilize Zombies as a metaphor for the personal (and ultimately societal) enslavement that porn addiction causes.  I do so because a common characteristic of Zombies is the insatiable desire to consume another human being, becoming less human with each bite!

Becoming less human is what precisely happens in the heart and mind of someone who is consistently viewing or is addicted to pornography.

Continue reading “A Dozen (or so) Alarming Trends Directly Related to Porn Addiction, Pt. 4”