How Hurricanes Help Develop Habits for the Long Journey Home!

Here we go again.

Hurricane Dorian is wreaking havoc already, and it’s still days from making landfall.  I have lived in Florida nearly all of my adult life.

As such, I am accustomed to dealing with hurricanes.

By saying that I am accustomed to dealing with hurricanes, I don’t mean to imply that I know how to handle them. Instead, I mean that expecting them, preparing for them, and doing my best to endure them is now a matter of habit.

Indeed, activities I used to give considerable forethought, are now second nature.  For example, without much thought, I have already taken the following steps to get ready:

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What You Need to Know Before You Join a Recovery Group

Have you ever asked yourself, “What will it take to beat this addiction?”  I sure did.

Many times.







My wife asked it of me about a thousand times more than I asked it of myself.

Here’s the deal: If you’re asking, at least you are acknowledging that you have a problem!

Many Men Never Ask the Question: “What will it take?”

Most men – many men – never get that far.

While I can’t tell you every step you’re going to need to take, I can give you many of them.

One I’ve not discussed yet is the power of community!

I don’t know anyone who has ever beat addiction in isolation!

So, if you’re fighting alone, then you’re falling apart!

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Want to Recover From Porn Addiction? Discover the Power of Habit Formation!!

If you want to recover from your porn addiction, you will need to discover the power of habit formation!

Discovering and developing new habits are central to your freedom!


Many reasons, but one is that the porn habit you are now starving is going to get hungry.

When the addiction or compulsion gets hungry, it’s going to want you to feed it – as you have done so many times in the past.  That’s why the closer you are to your addiction, the more fiercely you have to fight against it!

I am not talking about white-knuckle fighting. Instead, the intentional, yet determined fight that discovers and develops positive habits that will begin (over time) to replace the old ones!

Habit Formation and Freedom

My recovery road is bumper-to-bumper habit formation.  As I review the last two decades of recovery, I see many habits that have come and gone (yes, they can be seasonal) and many more that have continued to serve me to this day.

In this post, I am going to share a few of my personal favorites.

I am also going to recommend some excellent resources.

I will then invite you to share yours with me.

In the early days of my recovery, the battle was, at times, debilitating.

If not for the following five habits, I am not sure where I’d be today, but I know I wouldn’t be here!

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Can I Be Clean Without a Full Confession?

When considering addiction, particularly porn, I don’t believe you can ever be free unless you fully confess!

Therefore, I often tell men who come to me for help that the most crucial step in your recovery and restoration process is the step of confession.

There is simply no way you will ever be whole if you don’t fully confess.

I don’t care what the addiction or compulsion is:

  • Porn or sexual addiction.
  • Alcohol.
  • Anger (yes, that can be an addiction).
  • The internet or social media.
  • Recreational or prescription drugs.
  • Work, success, reputation.
  • Nicotine
  • Gambling

To name only a few.

And, while I am a person of faith, this step has little to do with one’s faith conviction.  It does not matter if you have no faith, a deep faith, or are anti-faith!  Confession is part and parcel of what it means to be human and to be in relationship with others.

That’s why I never tasted freedom, or could even begin the journey into freedom, until I got the place where I was willing to fully confess my compulsion (sin, addiction) in several different ways.

So, if you want to be free and have the courage to live into freedom, read on for some things I’ve done, and continue to do, to live into freedom!

Continue reading “Can I Be Clean Without a Full Confession?”

How do I “Unsee” All Those Pornographic Images?

Have you ever wondered how to unsee all those pornographic images you’ve spent years viewing?

If so, you’re not alone.  In fact, that’s a common – and often misunderstood – part of the journey.  Especially when you want to make the transition from a life saturated by free-porn to a life that’s finally porn-free!

Once you decide it’s time to live a porn-free life, you begin to notice how hard it is to get all those images out of your head.

Many of us find ourselves fighting images every moment of the day.  Many find that pornographic images also haunt our dreams at night.

In my experience, the toughest part of the battle is unseeing what we’ve seen!

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